I feel like Thriving

    The Lil Wayne song "Feel like dying" has been stuck in my head  lately.  The song  chorus says "Only once the drugs are done, do I feel like dying, I feel like dying."  This is a super depressing song, and even though I've never done drugs, I feel a strong connection to it.

    The Bible has many instances where a sin life is known as death, or spiritual death (Romans 6:11, Romans 8:10, Colossians 2:13), and following Christ is true life (Matthew 7:14, Matthew 18:8, John 6:47).  Jesus offers us life to the full, and says that one who follows Him has life. 

    Yet so many times do I choose death over life.  So many times I'm prideful.  So many times do I lust.  So many times do I worship myself over God.  So many times I feel like I've failed completely. 

    Yet so many times I choose Jesus.  I choose to rejoice in the fact that I have a choice, that Jesus died, and rose again, and that I can have a relationship with Him.  I'm like a modern day Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, constantly changing and twisting into a seemingly different person.

    There have been times where I've been purely wallowing in death with seemingly no growth.  I worshipped myself, I worshipped the female body, I worshipped anything except Jesus.  And still, I was never satisfied.  I was never happy.  I was never content.    I was in a constant state of a semi-depression, wishing I could find contentment. 

    Fortunately, it doesn't end there.  Jesus offered me life and I took it, in which I am eternally thankful for the grace and mercy.  Now I have life in Jesus, I have life in knowing that there is something that is more worthy of worship than me.  And yet so often I have placed my joy in something that is not God.  Our mantra when we don't live for Christ often looks like this:

    "Only once the drugs are done, do I feel like dying, I feel like dying.  Only once the money is gone, do I feel like dying, I feel like dying. Only once the porn is done, do I feel like dying, I feel like dying.  Only once the popularity is gone, do I feel like dying, I feel like dying."

    Once we stake our happiness on something that is finite, our happiness will end.  Once we place importance on something that will die, our joy will die.  When we put something of less importance than Jesus (everything) in more of a priority than Jesus, surely we will realize the depravity of our wading in death.
 
    But there is more.  Jesus offers us life, and life to the full (John 6:27, John 6:63).  When we choose to accept it, Jesus replaces our old song with one that goes like this:

    "Even when the drugs are done, there is still life, there is still life.  Even when the money is gone, there is always grace, there is always grace.  Even when the porn is gone, Jesus offers mercy, Jesus offers mercy.  Even when the popularity is gone, Jesus is alive, Jesus is alive."

      We no longer have to suffer in the hopelessness of death.  We don't have to bet that something finite will give us joy.  We can stake our happiness on something everlasting.  When Jesus died, He gave us the opportunity to be cleansed us of our sin.  When He rose, He was metaphorically saying that we no longer have to be dead in our sins.  Jesus offers freedom.  Jesus offers hope.    Jesus offers life, and my prayer is that I will constantly accept it.